Love people where they are

I was reading to my kids the other night and they were not into it. I mean Laney was all over the place with random questions and Noah really wasn't even paying attention. I trudged through it and finished tucking them into bed and left frustrated.

The next day I was trying to show them letters on a paper because they asked me to write out their names for them so they could practice their names. But after barely getting it written on the paper for them they had moved onto something else. My day continued with similar situations of them not staying focused. I had had enough and put them in their rooms and jumped in the shower to pray and think. I do a lot of praying in the shower if you haven't noticed.

I was venting to God about the kids and the day and He showed a picture. It was a picture of Jesus surrounded by kids and He was telling them a story. And at first I saw it the "perfect way" because come on...it was Jesus! But then I saw it the way He wanted me to. The kids were fighting about who got to sit on His lap, who got to sit next to Him and in front of Him. And then I saw kids looking around and poking each other as Jesus was talking to them.

And at that very moment I realized that it wasn't about how the kids were acting but how He responded to them. He loved them where they were, not where they should have been. Oh MY...that truth hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that I have been loving people conditionally. I tried to change them into what I thought they needed to be in order to love them fully. I was so humbled at that very moment...and still am. I asked God to give me His love for people...to love them where they are not where they should be to me. Really when you think about it we all fall short and struggle with something so why not in our pursuit to be more like Jesus, we love like Him!

Make sure your mode matches your task

I was showering the other day and yes I do shower...occasionally. I had asked God a simple question and God asked me a question...which mode were you in? WHAT? See I was having a bad mommy day where the kids weren't really bad or anything I was just annoyed and took it out on them. I was asking God why my day was so bad and why I was taking it out on the kids.

I thought about the question and then prayed. I felt like He downloaded tons of info and I was a sponge soaking it all in. See as women we are multitaskers and we wear a lot of different hats. Some might wear wife, mommy, boss, employee, housekeeper, financial planner, teacher, etc. And although they are your hats and you cannot take them off you can rearrange them so that your mommy hat becomes your mode when faced with taking care of the kids. Or your work hat is on when you have the time to be in work mode. See I was in mommy mode but tried to squeeze in housekeeper and financial planner in there as well and instead of devoting the time to my kids I was cutting them short.

Don't get me wrong I believe you can do multiple things at a time and not lose your cool but for me during that situation my time should have been for them and what they needed at that time. I was focused on emptying the dishwasher and cleaning the counters when their little questions and interruptions of "mommy, can you help me put this dress on my Polly pocket?" and "Mommy, can you help me get my foot out of this toy?" started to get to me and I lost control of my emotions. I'm not saying you can't do the dishes or pay bills online but when it interrupts you being a good mommy and the result is you hurting your kids with your words or attitude then it's time to get out of multi-modes and just be in mommy mode so that you can focus on the task and do it well.

I now regulate time for cleaning, paying the bills, work and being a good wife and taking time for me. I have learned to adjust my life accordingly and make my priorities the people in my life and not the things that need to be done. When God gave me these precious treasures, He entrusted me with their lives and how I model my life in front of them plays a huge part in their character and upbringing.

My prayer is that I learn from my mistakes and raise godly kids that seek Him and go after what is important to their Papa's heart!